Putting My Values Together

The final step of the values-based integration journey begins. It is now time to tie it all together, and maybe gain some personal insight.

First, I must revisit the “Identifying Values” step. I deliberately held this piece of the puzzle somewhat wrong; which creates an issue. I only defined one value: the freedom to just be, without worry of how.

A quick rundown:

• Bible camp left me with a sense of purpose, and knowledge was rewarded
• The foul-mouthed, somewhat rude persona at the youth camp was liberating, if uncomfortable
• Metal shows have a structure, and I can stim, er, headbang and mosh, all I want
• Work builds on my strengths, and feedback is immediate and definitive
• Flow state is meditative and self-effacing.

The Values

So, which values can I glean from these exercises (and maybe some of the other writing related to the book)?

A Sense of Purpose

I need to do things that matter. They can matter to me, or to someone I care for and about, or go toward making the world less horrible. The care and nurture aspect of my work, or the personal project of knowing myself better, like all this writing.

Conversely, I can find it hard and/or frustrating to not have a purpose. I loathe looking up from reels on my phone and suddenly an hour or more have gone

Clear Direction

I need (to feel like I) understand the why of things. I still remember a meltdown? from when I was maybe 8, helping with chores. Using two rags to clean seemed excessive to me. My mother couldn’t explain it better than ‘because that is how it is done’; which frustrated me to no end. I also quite prefer clear parameters for progress and success if at all possible.

Time and Space to Be

Just being is a core value. Some people I can be around more easily than others, sometimes I need time alone to decompress.

Of course, If I overindulge in this impulse, I risk turning into a lonely recluse, even more than now is the case.