Masking as Overcorrection

A big part of “Unmasking Autism” is about recognizing the mask for what it is. This is not always straightforward if the mask is highly internalized. Today’s exercise is all about uncovering how, consciously or not, I might have modified my behavior to some greater or lesser degree; and crucially, hopefully, shedding a light on why.

The work sheet consists of a trait commonly associated with autistic people, and common strategies adopted to hide or overcompensate for them, in the format

I was told it was bad to be _ _ so I had to pretend to be _ _ by behaving this way

I was told it was bad to be annoying and loud, so I pretended to be agreeable and quiet by

• only expressing big emotions in private
• not getting to excited about even good things
• internalizing distress

I was told it was bad to be childish, so i pretended(?) to be mature by

• being a “little proffessor” (tfb I was a knowledge sponge) and by extension a teacher’s pet

I was told it was bad to be sensitive, so I pretended to be strong by

• not voicing my needs
• feeling ashamed by anger or sadness

I’ve noticed that I tend to abandon some of these sometimes, as I get older. I can get very loud indeed if there is engaging discussion going on. I am still a knowledge sponge, but I am not afraid to play and have fun openly.